They don’t write. They don’t call.

“The difference between me and you is that I do good fiction.” —speech to reporters at the National Press Club, May 18, 1999.

American historian and author, Tom Clancy, was born on this day in 1947 (died 2013).

I met Tom Clancy once. I was um…between jobs…and doing some contract work for friends who owned a company providing author escorts.

No, not that type of escort. Get your mind out of the gutter.

We drove authors to their press tour appointments. One day, my task was to drive a Hollywood producer to Clancy’s home on the Chesapeake Bay. It wasn’t as glamorous as you might think. I sat in the car while she met with him inside. But he walked her to the car and I got to say hello.

I didn’t tell him that, while I’ve seen movies based on his works, I’m not sure if I’ve ever read one of his books all the way through.

In another brush with Tom Clancy greatness, this time we’ll make it someone else’s, a friend was working as an extra when they were filming Clear and Present Danger. For the scene in the Senate Chambers, they needed more people. So, she called her husband and said “put on a suit and get down here.”

Rob did and in the final scene you can see him standing by the door as Harrison Ford walks in. His wife is in the room…somewhere…but she got paid.

Rob refers to it as “That movie I did with Hank.”

Not unlike the “movie I did with Kate Hudson.”

Sort of.

A number of years ago, I went on two post-Katrina construction trips to New Orleans. The second trip we were helping to restore a church that had a pre-school. We also built a fence for their play yard.

At the hospital across the street, Hudson was filming A Little Bit of Heaven (2011).

Craft services rented the fellowship hall of the church to feed the cast and crew. They offered to feed the five of us working at the church. We never saw Kate Hudson, but we were pretty spoiled with the food offerings.

I did actually work on a movie with Alfre Woodard. A few years back, she filmed Juanita (which I believe, only played on Netflix), here in Virginia. I worked overnight on the diner scene. I spent the night as the short order cook passing plates through the window. When Woodard walks into the diner, I’m technically to the left of the screen, but I was never seen.

Like my friend in the Clancy movie, I got paid. And once again enjoyed the stylings of Craft Services.

Still, the Academy Awards have never called.

I’ll never walk that red carpet, and I should add that the Tonys aren’t calling either.

I’ll settle for the New York Times Best Seller list…but y’all have to help me by buying and promoting my books.

Speaking of which, I’d like Amazon to know that I’m not interested in a list of best selling children’s books if mine don’t show on the list

I’m just sayin’.

As Yente said, meanwhile we suffer, oh how we suffer.

On a side note, if you’re casting Fiddler, I was born to play Tevye…and I’m running out of time.

I digress (but seriously…call me…).

I’m not suffering. At least not at the moment. I’ve had the chance to do some cool things.

I’ll keep doing cool things as long as I’m moving which is what I’m doing right now.

I’m moving on.

THINGS TO READ

Al Jaffee, Mad magazine’s longest-running contributor, dies at 102
Entertainment Weekly
The iconic cartoonist was famous for his Mad Fold-Ins and “Snappy Answers to Stupid Questions.”

Carriages, Crown Jewels … and an emoji. New details of King Charles’ coronation revealed
CNN

June 22 – July 14, 2023

Germany is shutting off its last nuclear power plants because shutting down the cleanest source of energy is totally the best way to beat climate change
Not the Bee
The final three German nuclear power plants are being closed down, and the people trying to save us from global warming are all celebrating.

Chester: The LEGO Group Project temporary Visitor Center installed
The Progress-Index
Over the next few years, 1,761 people will be hired to join the LEGO Team, a range of professional and production positions

Disney To Remove Problematic Kiss From Classic Movie, Snow White Will Now Remain Dead
The Babylon Bee
BURBANK CA – After mounting criticism from an avalanche of 3 people online, Disney has decided to release a new cut of the classic film Snow White. In the new version, Prince Charming will refrain from a non-consensual kiss and leave her to die instead.

WHAT I’M READING



BORN ON THIS DAY

American singer-songwriter and guitarist, Vince Gill, was born on this day in 1957.


Available on Amazon (click)

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